Love Makes One Do Stupid Things
by Miyamashi
Summary: (Excuse the stupid title) In a bout of grief and desperation, Remus Lupin makes two horrible mistakes. (SB/RL SLASH) (Rating Upped due to violence in Chapter 3)
1. A Very Dark and Gloomy Day Indeed

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Love Makes One Do Stupid Things

Ch. #1: A Very Dark and Gloomy Day Indeed

By: Miyamashi

Author's Note: This fic takes place sometime AFTER _Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix._ I got the idea for it at choir camp in the wee hours of the night. I must warn my readers that there are two types of fics that I write. The first is a group of highly insane, often completely nonsensical comedies. The second is a group of highly ironic angst/romance fics in which I rampantly kill my favorite characters. This is a fic of the second kind. But do not fear, I like happy endings. 

Also note that this fic will probably have to be deemed an AU, but that's okay. I just had some weird inspiration and decided to write it down.

Pairing: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (AKA: The One True Way) If you don't like it, buzz off.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the places used in this fic. I don't even delude myself into believing that I do. This also means that I don't own any of the money made off of said places and characters, so suing me would be silly. Just having a bit of harmless fun. No offense to JK Rowling or the world she has created. 

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It was a very dark and gloomy day for the current inhabitants of Number Twelve, Grimmauld place, and they were all setting up for a very dark and gloomy dinner.

That is, all but one man. He was the Werewolf and Ex-Professor Remus J. Lupin. He'd been having a considerably more dark and gloomy day than everybody else, and had receded to his room to sulk, but seeing as the dark and gloomy dinner was almost ready, Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger set up to get him. 

What they found was not what they had expected. 

Lupin was sleeping very peacefully in his bed. In fact, he seemed so peaceful, it looked as if he wasn't even breathing. 

What a silly thought.

Hermione felt kind of bad waking him, seeing as he seemed so calm, but she still reached out to nudge his shoulder and jerk him from his dreams. Suddenly, the brown-haired girl noticed something.

Her earlier thought wasn't nearly as silly as she'd first suspected. 

Remus Lupin was _not_ breathing.

Remus Lupin was dead.

He was very obviously dead, judging by the rigor mortis that greeted Hermione's outstretched hand.

She screamed. 

********

Harry and Ron both stepped past their friend, trying to see what was the matter. After a moment of shocked silence, Ron made a pitiable squeaking sound and stumbled backwards. Harry just gaped.

As The Boy Who Lived continued to ogle at the figure in front of him, he couldn't help but to wonder why his previous Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, whom he happened to like a great deal, had suddenly and unexpectedly died. 

His first thought was that somebody had managed to break into the room and use the worst of the forbidden curses, _avada kedavra_ on the man, but Harry knew from personal experience that people who died from that particular curse had a look of extreme shock on their faces. Lupin, on the other hand looked very calm and--Dare he think it?--almost content. 

Harry was suddenly jerked from his land of thought by a retching sound coming from a certain redhead boy behind him. Hermione started to sob fitfully, occasionally making a feeble hiccupping noise. Harry stared at his two best friends for a moment before he dropped to the ground and started shaking. 

Not another one…

So much death…

No more…

Please…

********

Being dead felt a great deal different than Remus had anticipated. His soul was currently drifting in a great, black void, and he felt quite warm and fuzzy inside. 

Then, he noticed something that made his warm fuzziness skyrocket. 

It was _the light_. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, and it was filtering through the blackness, beckoning to him. He smiled and began to drift peacefully toward it. Just ahead of him was what he wanted. 

When he was just moments away from the wonderful light, he saw the beginnings of a silhouette. It was the form of a tall man with elbow length hair, and it was reaching out to him. Remus held out his hands toward the figure of Sirius Black, and when their proverbial fingers were just touching, Remus realized that he had made a terrible mistake. 

He was being selfish. He had left behind the people who needed him.

With that slight pang of guilt, the werewolf felt himself being dragged away from the light. His fingers slipped out of Sirius' grasp. 

********

On that dark and gloomy day, the remaining inhabitants of Number Twelve Grimmauld Place flooded into the room of Remus Lupin to find three traumatized teenagers and an extremely miserable ghost.

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Author's Note: Thanks for reading! Next chapter coming eventually. (Hopefully in the next couple of days) Reviews are appreciated. Very much so. ^.^ (Also, I'm sure you noticed that this fic is in desperate need of a new title. If you have any ideas, input would be nice. Thanks!)


	2. A Ghost's Lament

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Love Makes One Do Stupid Things

Ch. #2: A Ghost's Lament

By: Miyamashi

Author's Note: Sorry that the first chapter was so short. I just felt that where I ended it was a good place to stop. This one is longer, really. (Though not much so) It also somehow manages to sound very comedic in a few places. I think I need to refrain myself from writing angst fanfics after reading Douglas Adams (Author of _The_ _Hitchhikers' Guide to the Galaxy_, _Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency_, etc…) books…they make me think in stranger ways than usual! 

Well, not much else to say, except for that I'm growing strangely used to the stupid title. It actually kind of goes with the odd writing style…

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There was a moment of shocked silence as everyone registered the scene before them. Remus Lupin was dead, and his ghost was now sitting half-submerged in his own corpse, rocking silently back and forth. The children were probably scarred for life. This was not good at all.

Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody was the first to break the silence. 

"What is going on here?" he growled, a trace of fury etched in his voice. The others, including Harry, Ron And Hermione, turned toward him. "Who _did this_?" His voice was now almost a scream.

"…I did…" said Remus, hardly audible because he was speaking nervously into his knees.

All eyes in the room moved from Moody to the translucent, pearly figure on the bed. Nobody said anything for a very long time, and the room became completely silent, save for the occasional shaky breath. 

Harry was in a state of shocked unbelief. Why would Lupin kill _himself_? 

But before Harry could ponder any more, Remus' voice once again softly laced the air. 

"Please….please stop looking at me like that. I…don't know what got into me. I just…gave up." His eyes had become wild, fearful, and laced with silvery tears. His now slightly echoed voice took on a rushed and sporadic tone. "I couldn't stand it any longer…I couldn't live without…and then I realized what I'd done…but it was too late…too late…too late…" 

He kept mumbling those last two words over and over again. Numerous questions sprang from the lips of the others, but the ghost ignored them, his head in his hands as he continued to rock in place. 

********

The living inhabitants of Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place sat silently around the even more dark and gloomy dinner table. After about a half-hour of attempting to talk to a ghost who was clearly lost in his own grief, they dejectedly gave up and decided to leave him to his own devices. 

It had been almost a week since then, and things didn't seem to be improving. Every so often, somebody would go up to the second story room and see if there had been any improvements, but it was always the same.

"…too late…too late…too late…"

********

Sirius Black was an unquestionably unhappy spirit. Had he been mistaken, or had he seen and touched the one he loved? He knew that he should be happy that Remus was probably now off living his life in at least pseudo-peace, but he couldn't help but to feel as if he'd been ripped off. 

He had been so happy, even if it was only for about ten seconds. 

Of course, there was always the possibility that Sirius had been delusional, but he didn't particularly like to consider that version of events. 

So what if that _possibility_ was actually more of a _probability_? 

Blast it all. Sirius just wanted to see that face and to feel that touch again. He wanted Remus to come back, even if he hadn't really been there at all. He didn't care if he was being selfish and possessive. _He wanted to snog_…or something to that effect. 

After Sirius had retrieved his head from the gutter, he once again grinned at how much he liked the afterlife. He silently thanked whomever had arranged it so spirits could feel things. Of course, he wanted nothing more than to feel _Remus_.

Yes. Sirius Black was a very grumpy spirit indeed.

********

Ginny Weasley was getting annoyed. She really did feel sorry for Lupin for…whatever it was…but she was beginning to get curious and just slightly stir crazy. She needed to get that depressed ghost to stop wallowing in self pity so they could see if there was any way to help him, but she couldn't think of how. 

So she asked Tonks. The two of them tried a great deal of things. It started with trying to make physical contact with the ghost. They attempted to poke him. They threw things at, or rather through him. Then, they tried shining bright lights at him. Nothing. Not even a twitch. 

Then, Tonks had a crazy, wonderful, completely devilish idea. 

It was evil because it'd probably cause everyone in the household to go into cardiac arrest, but hopefully jerk Lupin out of his trance in the process. 

Everyone staying in the old Black Manor had been especially careful not to wake the portrait of the old woman in the entry hall. That was about to change, due to the fact that Tonks accidentally caused herself to trip over the umbrella stand. Nobody would suspect a thing. 

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"…too late…too late…" Remus murmured to himself for what had to be the billionth time. 

Then, an ear-splitting screech shattered his thoughts completely. He probably would have had a heart attack if he weren't dead already. He shook his head irritably and floated through the bed and the floor (Dumbledore had made Moody remove the body, somehow still not disturbing the werewolf-spirit, before it had started to rot) to see who had awakened Sirius' mother. 

********

Even though you couldn't hear it, due to the screaming portrait, Ginny and Tonks both yelped in surprise as the pearly figure emerged from within the ceiling. After the initial alarm, they turned toward each other and grinned. It had worked!

Now they just needed to shut the portrait up. 

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Author's Note: Yeah, it's still short. I'm not great at writing long chapters. Luckily, I'm really liking this fic so far, so updates should come fairly frequently. Note that I don't really need title suggestions anymore. I think I'll just keep the current one. (Mostly out of laziness) Well, until chapter three…


	3. As If Things Could Get Any Worse

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Love Makes One Do Stupid Things

Ch. #3: As If Things Couldn't Get Any Worse

By: Miyamashi

Author's Note: Many thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far! It means a lot to me! This Chapter is almost completely devoid of Douglas Adams inspired humor, which sucks. I'll be sure to get back to that in the future. This chapter is also my least favorite so far, but that's just me. 

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After the eardrums of everyone in the household had thoroughly burst, the portrait of Mrs. Black finally quieted down. To Ginny's and Tonks' dismay, Remus' ghost began to recede back through the ceiling. They yelled after him, trying to get him to stay, and finally managed to persuade him to follow them and tell everyone his situation. 

When everyone had gathered around a fire in the messy sitting room, Remus slowly began his story. 

"It…started when we were fighting the Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries. I knew that Lestrange hated Sirius. I should have figured that she'd go after him first…but I didn't…" the ghost paused and the flickering fire seemed to enhance the dismal look in his eyes. The others urged him to continue, and he did, although softer than before. 

"Then he was gone, and I felt so alone. I knew that I still had all of you, but Sirius was…different. He was…no…I can't say it." He tried to change the subject, but Harry stopped him.

"Sirius was my only real family!" Harry shrieked vehemently. "I know he was your friend, but shouldn't it be worse for _me_? I'm only a kid, and _I_ didn't go off and die!" This struck a chord with Remus, and he floated quickly over to Harry, fury taking over every part of his figure.

"_You didn't know him like I did,_" Lupin hissed venomously, inches away from Harry's face. "_When you met Sirius, you already had friends who didn't shun you for who you were…You…**You weren't in love with him!**_" 

At that, everyone froze in place. Harry stared. Had Lupin just said what he thought he had? Had his ex-teacher just clearly stated that he was in _love_ with his godfather? 

Noticing the way Harry's eyes had widened at his last statement, Remus' fury had abided and was replaced with fear. He quickly drifted backwards and surveyed the faces of the people around him. People were gawking at him. Severus Snape looked absolutely appalled. A few people had started to whisper amongst themselves.

Dumbledore, on the other hand, didn't look shocked at all. The headmaster of Hogwarts stood slowly and waved a silencing hand around the room. All conversation stopped.

"I believe that we should let Remus continue," Dumbledore stated calmly and simply. A murmur of agreement could be heard from around the room. The specter's account of what had happened met with varying responses, but nobody, save for Snape, seemed to take Lupin's statement of affection for his friend _too _badly, although there were lots of questions. 

Remus was especially pleased to note that, once Harry had overcome his initial shock, the boy had been more curious than revolted. He had asked Harry why this was, and had eventually come to the conclusion that, because the Dursleys had openly disproved of homosexuality, Harry had felt compelled to back him up.

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The next few days passed in an almost normal fashion. Multiple people had assured Remus that they would figure out some way to help him, and this had brightened his mood by a surprising amount. As he drifted along the hallways, reliving happy moments that he had spent with Sirius, he felt almost alive again. 

The only thing that _really_ bothered him now was the fact that he couldn't eat anything. Of course, he still wanted to see Sirius, but he was feeling a great deal more hopeful about that than he had in a while. 

It was that night when everyone else was enjoying their delicious dinner from Molly Weasley that something struck Remus. 

The full moon would rise in any moment, and he had no idea if he'd still transform in his ghostly state. 

Before he could say anything or ponder any longer, he felt a familiar sensation penetrating the man-made walls. 

He could feel the lunar pull, and that could mean only one thing…

********

Ron, who had been chatting animatedly with Lupin, stopped eating for a second as the ghost dropped into a sudden contemplative silence. Then, the silvery figure went rigid, and the redhead stood swiftly, knocking over his chair. The 'clunk' of the wooden chair was suddenly drowned out by a massive, echoing scream that could have put Mrs. Black to shame. 

Those who had still been eating stopped, and forks and knives dropped to their plates. The ghost of Remus Lupin was lengthening and growing, and worse, becoming less ethereal by the second. His soft, silvery luminescence had subsided, and was replaced by a shocking, gleaming white. His figure had become more opaque and his eyes had darkened to a deep, wild, menacing amber. 

Ron had only seen one other ghost that looked anything like the one that was growling at him only a foot away from his face. Peeves.

With horror, he realized that Remus Lupin, in his werewolf state, was a _poltergeist_. 

********

Lady Black's portrait began to scream, but nobody really cared, seeing as they were all much more intent on getting away from the massive, white wolf that had just started to demolish its surroundings. 

Not good. Really, really bad, in fact. 

Luckily for Ron, who had frozen in place, Harry grabbed him and pulled him out of the way as a bowl flew past his head and shattered on the wall. All living inhabitants of the house fled through the large double doors and bolted it shut behind them. 

The Remus-wolf hurled itself at the door, causing it to splinter before realizing that poltergeists could go through walls. 

Hermione was flung at the staircase, and she collided with the banister and collapsed, unconscious. A few people tried spells, but the wolf dodged them with ease, and continued to ravish the crowd. 

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That night, three people, Hermione Granger, Fred Weasley, and Mundungus Fletcher, were carried to St. Mungo's to be treated for serious injuries. Hermione had three cracked ribs and a fairly minor concussion from where she'd collided with the banister. Fred's shins had both been snapped by a large marble statue that had been heaved toward him. Mundungus had a table leg through his left shoulder. 

It was very lucky that nobody had died, but there wasn't a person in the household who hadn't been wounded in some way or another. The next morning, Remus regained his normal form, sickened by the damage that he had undoubtedly been responsible for.

It was obvious that something needed to be done before the next full moon, or the consequences would likely be fatal. 

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Author's Note: Ack! Poor Remus! (And the three really hurt peoples) As if things weren't bad enough already! (They'll get better, though, I swear!) As par usual, read and review. If you wish to be notified of upcoming chapters (and you haven't already expressed that wish to me), just tell me, and I shall do so! 

About the poltergeist thing. Yes, there's some sort of logic behind that. Poltergeists are supposedly formed when a spirit is particularly mischievous or cruel. Remus' werewolf side fits that description, so I figured that it'd make sense for him to become a poltergeist when he transforms. 


	4. Determination and Desperation

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Love Makes One Do Stupid Things

Ch #4: Determination and Desperation

By: Miyamashi

Author's Note: Just to clear up some things in the last Chapter, Remus asked Harry why he wasn't revolted and Harry told him. The declaration of love was so short because Remus was too furious to be eloquent. Also, something that I noticed was that I mentioned a Weasley twin (which means that both are at the house) when they're supposed to be running the joke shop. Let's just say they're visiting! -.- The rest was my fault. Like I said, that chapter was _not_ my best. 

About the Barnum thing mentioned by Polkat. (To my DeviantART readers, Polkat is one of the people who reviewed my fic on Fanfiction.net.) I feel stupid now. I should have known that bit of info, seeing as I'm both American AND a theatre geek! (In fact, I'm going to major in Musical Theatre…) ACK!!! I just didn't see how he related in any way to the title. Now I do! Thank you for clearing that up! (Sorry about the likeness to the song title, but I really can't think of anything better!)

I would also like to thank Huan the Wolfhound and godzilla, (also from Fanfiction.net) along with Mirime from DeviantART for giving me such great reviews. 

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It was a horrible feeling, knowing that you've hurt your friends, but a worse one knowing that you could have, and might have, killed them. Remus J. Lupin knew that this was how it was. 

Even more terrible was knowing that there was no way to contain or tame a poltergeist. If something wasn't done by the next full moon, people were going to die. There was nowhere he could run. The wolf wanted blood. It wanted to kill, and no walls or cages or potions could stop it. 

Remus sunk into a pitiful heap on the floor and cried. 

********

As he dripped a stinging potion that was much like an equivalent of Muggle antiseptic onto a cut on his forearm, Severus Snape was disgusted. He was disgusted at Dumbledore, at that _Potter_ boy and his friends, and, most of all, at the blasted, worthless ghost. 

Nobody _ever_ listened to Severus. Nobody listened when he told them not to trust the werewolf. Tame werewolf his butt. Nobody listened to him when he had told everybody to exorcise the prat when he'd become a ghost. 

Stupid Lupin. Everybody loved Lupin. Why couldn't they just get over it and have a dementor come and eat him or something? He was sure that a dementor could take care of the problem. It'd just administer the kiss without any troublesome body to get in the way. 

Of course, when he'd suggested this to Albus, the headmaster had just about had his head on a plate. 

Nope, nobody gave a bloody damn about Severus.

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It was then, as he wiped the last of the stubborn, glistening tears from his eyes, that Remus decided to stop sulking and do something about the situation. First, he would go and visit the people that he'd injured. Then, he'd help the others think up a plan. After all, the only way for the situation to improve was for him to be brought back to life or to be killed again. 

That would be achieving the impossible, and if they were going to do so, they would need his help. 

********

As the ghost floated through the halls of St. Mungo's, many people looked on with distaste. The dead were not normally permitted as visitors due to their slightly chilling effect on the living, and were usually shooed out of the door. (Or the wall, as the case may be.)

__

This ghost would not be deterred. 

"I will not leave until I speak to Hermione Granger, Fred Weasley, and Mundungus Fletcher, whether I'm permitted or not," stated Remus firmly to the healer that was running along beside him.

"Sir, ghosts are not permitted inside this building. It's against Ministry regulations!"

"Well, the Ministry can sod off," and with that, he floated through the wall, which thoroughly ended the conversation. 

The hospital was a very large place, and, seeing as nobody was very keen to violate Ministry rules and give him directions, the spirit had to search for quite a while until he found what he was looking for. Luckily, the three patients were in the same ward, being treated for similar wounds. 

The three greeted Remus fairly warmly, all of them relieved to see that he was back to being practically his old self again. The healers had already mended the broken bones, and Hermione was perfectly conscious. They were free to go.

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That night, all of the inhabitants of Number Twelve once again gathered together around a warm fire. It was then that they began to come up with a plan to save themselves and Remus. 

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Author's Note: See, I told you that the situation would start getting better. I should be able to wrap this up in a chapter or two. Then I'll be making a "Remastered Edition", in which I generally clean up the story and add a few extra scenes. Well, until Chapter 5...(hopefully, that one won't take as long to write as this one did, but I can make no guarantees!)


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